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It’s Christmas Card time for us.

November 7, 2010

It’s that time of the year; to gather addresses, cards, envelopes and stamps.  To set time aside to create a wonderful letter to those on your mailing list.

You pause to remember the year, and write down the highlights for all in your family.

Well, in our case it’s a bit different. I have learned to look for the hope in most things. To not focus so much on the bad or painful. But even in my most bright hour, the pain still resides within. Although I have the strength of God, I still succumb to the sudden deep tears.

I am done with our letter now, but something just doesn’t seem right with it. I’m not sure if it’s the literary side, or the simple fact that Michael is not here to write about. Might be a combination of both.

And although we have much to be thankful for this year, the one elephant in the room is that our son is not going to enjoy this coming season with us. When others get to hear the childish laughter of silly kids playing in wrapping paper, we won’t.  This is painful to realize. Painful to accept.  Accept it we must for no other way is going to happen.

So, even with the pain I will walk into this season joyful and full of hope for tomorrow.

God has been good to us, we are blessed by family and friends daily.

Blessings (& Christmas cards and tears)

Peg

PS. Even now the pain can hit like a sledgehammer to the gut, creating those deep dark sobs of sorrow. Although now, it’s like a brief storm that passes sooner. It still leaves residue behind though.

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