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July 13, 2010

How do I explain the heaviness of grief, and despair?

What words can carry the true meaning of it to you?

If only you could see that I am not me.

It will take some time before I resemble the woman who was known as Peggy.

Nothing has changed in my life, to explain why I am so sad and down lately…

Nothing but Michael.

Do I need another reason to be depressed? Please no…Michael is enough.

No one can understand the strange path Grief takes in each persons life.

I’m sure not even the person on that path can tell you…it’s impossible.

I would love to tell you that I’ll be functional on this day, this day and that day…

But I don’t know when the moments will overwhelm me…Oh, how I wish I could, so I could avoid them!

What is good for me now?

What direction do I take?

What choice is there for me, that will be healthy for me now?

Oh deep despair, you follow along with Grief so well, so close and so heavy.

My head can’t rise up, my heart is broken forever, my mind is numb with grief, my soul is searching and seeking…but isn’t finding answers that satisfy.

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