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Grief, or something like it.

July 2, 2010

Grief.

What is it? It’s not something you can touch, but it has the ability to overwhelm all of your other senses.

We are told that there are stages of grief, that you work through, to the final goal, to have moved on from the situation that induced the grief.

Kubler-Ross (1969) was the one who first classified it as 5 stages; denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance.

In the ‘normal’ phases of life, grief is usually experienced by the child, who’s lost a parent, or a spouse who’s lost a spouse.

But Death doesn’t respect the ‘order’ of life. It makes it own rules, and follows it’s own path.

So, instead, we have parents burying their children, a newlywed mourning their spouse, a young child lost without either parent, and on it goes.

Grief is not pretty, and it doesn’t fit into a little box with a nice somber ribbon.

It’s like someone has put all of your emotions into a bag, shook it up, and poured it out on you, daily, even hourly.

Many types of grief do not ever go away. They become your shadow, following you in your life, sometimes you see glimpses of it, other times you don’t.

I miss my son. I grieve what we have lost with him. I grieve the fact that now my husband and I won’t rest easy with more children. I just grieve.

Grief.

What does it mean to you? It means a expanse to me…

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3 Comments leave one →
  1. July 2, 2010 11:53 am

    To me, grief means an endless lake of tears that must seep through my eyes at any given time. Waking up to a gray world in a king size bed, alone. Knowing at 56, it feels too late to begin again, even if I had the thoughts to do that. Looking down a long, long, march of years into old age with only memories of a once in a lifetime love. Grief is questions unanswered and an abrupt loss of joy, hope, anticipation and possibilities. Time, time — please swallow me up soon

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